Sarabande, Ch. 7
” Man, I thought I said no crew in my room — oh, it’s you, Stella.,” Tracy cackled. ”You want to wear a different shirt? Somehow I just can’t see it…”
” Thanks,” Stella said. ”I mean, if it was you on it, maybe, but I don’t like feeling like a fan… Us groupies got our pride.”
” Yeah, baby, and I love a proud woman.,” He handed her a plain black teeshirt. ”Oh, much better. The classics are always best, ain’t they? What were you talking about, with Tony?”
” Just about the tour, that it’s tough going… Do you really want me to come with you?”
” You’d best believe I want you around,” he said. ”Any dame that jacks off in the shower, for five minutes straight…”
Her eyes widened momentarily, that fearful look, before her face shut down again. ”Bull,” she said; he grinned.
” Uh huh, I was there from the start. You didn’t even see me open that door, you was working it so hard.,” He couldn’t help it, needling her this way. It was as if they’d already been together years.
His sensitive ears had heard it, the water unchanging, and he’d seen her standing there through the bubbly glass. Opened the door, and saw the real thing. Hunched over, belly slack. One leg up. No moans, no dance. Direct communication, herself to herself. Water spraying everywhere, and him in his leather jeans that can’t get wet. He couldn’t look away from the private spectacle he was invading. We never show ourselves like that, we arch our backs, point our toes a little. It hadn’t been sexy, there was no reason for that. It was sex. But then she saw him. Watching her body come back to life, seeing another person there. Communication again; fear in her eyes, or something like it; defiance. That had been pretty fucking sexy. Frozen with her hand in her cunt. Still as death, but somehow different in quality, and being new lovers, a flicker in her eyes. Saying; ‘what are you gonna do with this, sucker? Scare me a little, I dare you.’
” You just lost track of time and everything,” he told her. ”Are you always this nasty?” He was nearly sorry he’d said that. Her face looked like it was about to fall apart. Just that split second. And then she said, lightly;
” Nobody’s ever out-nastied me yet.”
” Oh,” he said. ”Lord…”
” Can’t you leave it alone,” she demanded, and turned to face him. ”What is this?”
He leaned back against the wall with a dancer’s grace. ”Because. You looked so scared when you saw me…. I bet you wouldn’t look that guilty if I caught you fucking another man.”
Stella couldn’t think of a thing to say. Tracy waited a minute longer, marvelling.
” Well, I know who my rival is,” he said at last. ”There ain’t nobody who can do you better than me. Except one… I know, if you ever slip away for the night, it’ll be just you and those five fingers, ain’t that right. I could hire a detective to trail you to some cheap motel, and he’ll bring back the pictures… Just you, all alone… No co-respondent.”
” Are you really gonna be jealous of my right hand?” Stella demanded. Her heart was hammering, loud enough to scare her. ”Trace. You better go write a song about what you just said, because it sounds like a hit.”
” Trying to change the subject?”
” How old were you when you first jacked off?”
It was his turn to hesitate. ”Uh… About five, I guess… But I didn’t come, till I was ten, or eleven.”
” Well, I was three, and I did come, if I remember it right. I snuck away from my own birthday party to do it. So I’ve been doing it for a long time now. Well it just happened, that’s all… Oh, hell, I’ve wanted you so bad for so long…,” she took a deep breath. –Lay the cards out– ”Ever since I heard ‘Candy Hearts’ on the radio…,” She offered him a timorous smile. ”I’m kind of a starfucker, you know… But I always thought it would be good between us,” –Shut up, quick — she told herself.
” I might have done it, too.,” Tracy said, and laughed. ”‘Cept, I couldn’t feel my dick,” His voice went husky. ”I never saw a woman do it like that before, so… private. Secret… You made me feel so left out… I am falling in love with you, no lie. You’re so complex.”
Stella snorted; ”Oh, shut up. Look, I’ll do it again for you, if you want — I’ll give you the whole show.,” She licked her lips suggestively; Tracy returned her a bump and grind that was of a caliber to make her forget what she was doing.
” Yeah, but it ain’t the same thing, baby. I bet I never catch you like that again.”
” I hope not.,” she said fervently.
” What were you thinking about? Me? or Tony’s big dick…”
–Yes, and your voice talking me crazy while Tony fucked me from the back, with skill and passion, and three dozen other images, each one a miracle. No one gets this lucky, no one– But what she said aloud was; ”Fuck you, you want to know everything, don’t you? Okay, I was thinking about how you sucked Tony’s come out of my mouth. I was imagining him stuffing his big dick down your throat.”
Not bad on the spur of the moment, and by the way he winced, she’d struck a nerve. ”Tell me about it?” she said, gently.
” Oh, man, I don’t know.,” he mumbled, and shifted nervously. Suddenly, the words rushed out of his mouth; ”I mean, I goof on him about it, and he always trips out, but we did used to do it. Man, he gave me my first orgasm, I gave him his — and now he acts like he don’t remember. He was pretty freaky, once upon a time. This is as close as it gets, sharing a dame — sharing you, baby… I just wanna see him ease up, I ain’t gay, I…” He made a sound of frustration; ”Everyone says all this shit about me, how I do it with everyone, and it ain’t true — I’d do it for Tony.” He stopped abruptly, staring at her. He looked so young, so fragile. ”You –,” He shut up again. ”You make me talk too much,” he said at last.
” Well,” Stella was somewhat at a loss. ”He said, this morning, it wasn’t his style. But it sure turned him on, last night…,” She considered further. ”Tracy? I came looking for you… Everything they say about you. We… Me and you…”
” Hey!” Tony boomed. The door slammed behind him. ”Call this dame, would you? I just know she’s gonna make me happy…,” He threw himself into the sofa. ”Alegra, mmnn.,” he savored the name.
” That right?” Tracy said quietly to Stella. His look hearkened back to their own conversation.
“Yes, Tracy,” she replied, and Tony said; ”Oh, man, was I interrupting something?”
” Alegra means ‘happy’ In Italian,” she told him, picking up the phone. ”What should I tell her?”
” Tell her, I got ten inches of talent just waiting for her.”
” Slow down, Tone,,” she cautioned him. ”You should stop and introduce yourself first, okay? Show a little class…”
–Lord, dames can talk — Tracy thought to himself. Bits of her conversation floated towards him. –Wish I could hear the rest of it — He padded over to eavesdrop better.
” –dumped him?” she was saying. ”Good. I’m glad that’s over. Did you see her at Tom’s, in that gold lamé thingie, with her tits falling out? She got new ones. From a ‘B’ to a ‘D’, and she won’t buy any new dresses–,” and she cackled like a hag. ”Who? oh yeah… Listen, I got this guy for you. Yeah, call me Madam Pimp. He’s a musician… Lead guitar, of course… Yeah, he’s working… Black boy, kinda down home… no shit, he can fuck you till you see stars… Because I’m with his best friend. No. You touch him, I’ll kill you, I swear–,” Tracy hugged himself in glee — ”Because I’m in love… Yeah, for reals… Yeah, I did… I don’t know, I fell in love with one and not the other… Because he’s too good to waste on some cow, like he’ll get around here… Hyatte, I told you, they’re on tour, okay? Okay, go by my house first and get my hippie jeans, and some tops and my sneaks, okay? And bring some stuff for yourself for a couple of days… You won’t be leaving, trust me… And get my black dress with the red sash for yourself, for tonight… No, you cannot borrow my shoes, Alegra! Yeah, the Hyatte. Yeah, I know. So come straight up, room one, one, nine… No… No, he’s kinda shy, even… Get here quick, okay? Look, I’ll pay you back the taxi if it doesn’t work out–,”
She hung up without saying goodbye, turning so quickly that Tracy had no chance to back away, and so was discovered. He danced away from her glare, chortling.
” You gonna kill her if she touches me… You fight for your men, baby? Ah, lord, I gotta see this… Y’all pull hair, and shit?”
” Watch your mouth,” she told him, chagrined yet laughing. Judging her moment, she shoved his chest just when he was poised on one foot, and sent him hurtling back onto the bed. She came after him, rolled into his arms, sighed happily.
” I’d just as soon give you away,” she murmured, ”as fight over you…”
” Oh, we’ll see about that,’ he said. ”All those sexy starfuckers out there, you’ll have to chop, sometime.,” Ooh, some kind of fire in her eyes there. She sat on his chest, hand upraised;
” I’ll slap you down fast, that’s all.”
–Oh lord– Tracy bit back everything at once, every little reaction, his whimper, his wriggle, held himself still as death. –Lord, don’t let her see– Blackness, webbed with light.
” What were you talking about?” Tony called from the sofa. Stella got up to join him. Tracy sat up, cautiously. Gina’s voice came back to him, from last night; ‘You gave her the coat, right?’ –I gave her the coat, Geens, but she’s taking everything else, without asking– He got a fresh cup of coffee, and went over, to stare blankly into the mirror.
” I said you were real shy, and she’d have to make the first move.,” Stella was telling Tony solemnly.
” Aw, you’re good to me… You tell her my measurements?”
” I said you didn’t think you were big enough, and she should try to be nice about it.”
Tracy choked, and put down his cup. Tony groaned, covering his face. ”That’s cold, Stella…,” he whined. ”She won’t wanna see me at all! Why you wanna say that for, girl?”
” Relax,” she laughed. ”It appeals to her mother instincts.,” Tracy laughed even harder. With this girl’s smart mouth, she’d survive the tour bus, probably.
